Her

You’re coming back
In a few hours
And I am terrified
To see you

I am terrified of your face
Reflecting the absence of mine

I just hope I don’t change my mind

(Constantly in fear
Of her
I have tamed the worst of her
For now)

Workout

To get the words back
Exercise1
Stretching the thoughts further than
The obvious

You left me with a frozen brain
Fading in itself

The memories of before
Your arrival, are blurry

And the ones to come
Are left to my imagination

They told me it would fade
as I grow older
then I must be close to a hundred

Trust

Teach me to let the rains
Slip through my fingers
Into your mouth

Let me fall in your arms,
Backwards
Without hesitations

I want to know your lips,
And the presence of your eyes

I want to know myself through you
Regardless of myself

Presents

You gave me a fur coat
And I gave you cuflinks
One broke,

You left to new brunswick
And showed it to your mother

I stayed around
But all the words had gone

Precious little diamond

Rest their souls

and as i look at the bottles
which line the back wall.
i wonder if this is what they meant
by their huddled masses.
my little life buoy arrives just in time
to keep the salt water from drowning me.
and as i lean back
i can see the moon smiles for
you and i alike
brothers in a miserable poem
written my our drunken dads
and the mothers who loved them
god rest their souls

by Dutch S.

P; Marie Jane

Cigarette butts

cigarette butts have been erected like headstones
in a tidy row across my bedside table.
i creak as i roll over to face
the window, whose tiny slivers
bare the gifts of clean air
clean city air
from the lungs of many
bestowed upon my face
with the full moons pale grace
a long walk ahead
keeps my mind pacing
from wall to wall
from thought to thought
until i repeat myself
over and over
foreshadowing the journey ahead.
long strides
across the finish line
first to finish proudly
dead last in
this human race.

by Dutch S.

Mona Lisa

I can no longer keep up with the
Thoughts
That lead me to you
And away
And right back again

I take this confort for granted
And predict the worst reactions
To the lack of you
To the absence of most
To the forced encounters that will occur
Over the upcoming
Weeks

I wish I had more things to describe,
To write about,
To deconstruct

MUSE

the most magical video 
hotel room, lindsay, sofia, petey, cigarettes, booze, skin, markers, sheets…..

an old picture of mine

laurence as ophelia